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If you think YOU have a hard time getting a table...

Monday, April 01, 2013 - 09:00 PM

Common ancestor can't get a table

Even on a slow Monday night our nameless common ancestor was caught in the queue at City Winery. Sources say the furry, ID-less celebrity was eventually turned away, despite its story about dining "in this very same spot" millions of years before with THE Hungry Hippo. The ancestor let this reporter know that it's dying to try the restaurant's first house-made rosé. Can we help this creature get in the door?

If you can't see the survey below, you can vote here.

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Comments [1]

cazard from Earth

Schrewdinger!
For a smoother evolution!

Schrewdinger's opponent apparently claims a sudden, giant leap from insect munching and scurrying about directly to dumping waste into the oceans and paying mortgages, without anyone in between. This is just as ridiculous as can be!
[Applause, shouts of concurring]
Or is it perhaps that so-called 'Mancestor' thinks of HIM-self as the light at the end of the funnel, from whence no step further has to be made?
[Agreeing boohs]
I say, in that name alone we can see the egomania of a species that sees itself as the crown of evolution, not the proud forward-stepping, forward-slithering mongrel of mongrels of mongrels the bliss of ever active motion and mutation has evened the path for!
[Frenetic applause]
I say, let's commit ourselves to change and development, to the other, to what we will become, in honouring our grand-grand-grand-grand...grand mammal, for in this we'll honour what may become of us!
[Hysteric applause]
And when you give your vote, give it to the candidate you truly want!
Vote Schrewdinger - for the future may remain uncertain!
[Audience in fits]

Apr. 02 2013 05:35 AM

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